THE ETHNIC-EUROPEAN

THE MAD MONARCHS OF ABSURDISTAN

Prince Harry is set to announce his engagement to an American mixed race soft-porn star. The man many believe to be the prince’s real father would have approved.

Prince Harry bears a remarkable likeness to James Hewitt. The Household Cavalry British Army officer was in and out of the bed of Prince Harry’s mother for seven passionate years. Princess Diane, like many others who ‘knew where the royal bodies are buried’ is now also a royal body – a dead one.

Her lover, James Hewitt, (59) said to be Harry’s father, was a notorious dilettante who used at least one prostitute, likely more, in Mediterranean Spain. One wonders if the now ailing cavalier will be invited to ‘his son’s’ wedding.

Details are still emerging about Prince Harry’s fiancée, actress Meghan Markle. What is being said is that the Prince and the Gawper are leading with their chins due to her colourful background.

Is Prince Harry going to be comfortable with getting dark looks for the rest of his life? They will get darker as the skins of those of mixed race parentage grow darker by the year. Meghan will increasingly look like her mother; their children, this is anyone’s guess.

70-year old Doria Radlan.

The pair has the blessings of both their families. The Jewish porn star’s proud as Punch mom, 70-year old Doria Radlan. She made clear her approval of the relationship by jetting from her home in Los Angeles to be by Harry and her daughter’s side at the conclusion of the Invictus Games for wounded service personnel in Toronto at the weekend, which Harry founded. On the following Tuesday came reports the couple may already be engaged.

A future marriage would break several taboos for Britain’s royals. Markle is a divorcee who converted to Judaism on marrying her first husband. She is 36 and Harry is 33. But it is the fact that she identifies as mixed race (she is the daughter of a white father and an African-American mother) that will mark the most notable step backward for the hitherto all-white British Royal family.

Another taboo that may be broken is that if for any reason William and Kate are unable to ascend the throne then the world for the first time would see pictures of an English queen stark naked and in bed with fellow Thespians.

If the marriage of a half-Negro commoner to a ginger royal comes to pass, will it succeed in broadening the appeal of the royals to the non-white immigrants?

It may make them realise that there’s nothing special about the monarchy. It might be fun for the rest of us to witness the ghetto as it comes to Buckingham Palace. The Royal chefs will need to make sure the pantry is stocked with KFC and watermelon if this marriage is to succeed.

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